I don’t watch very much TV.
Correction: I watch TV, but it’s usually on Hulu and Netflix. Right now my boyfriend and I are working through the second season of Twin Peaks on Netflix Instant. We’re about 6 episodes in, so **SPOILER*** Ronette and Dr. Jacoby are no longer comatose, Nadine’s woken up but thinks she’s an 18-year-old vying for a spot on the cheerleading team, and Leo’s basically a vegetable, as he deserves to be after selling cocaine and beating people up during season 1. Karma’s a bitch.
So with the exception of recent Eurocup games on ESPN (ESPAÑA CAMPEONES!!!), my Blue Ray player and computer get a lot more use than my cable TV. This means that I haven’t seen most of the commercials currently airing on TV. I’m not terribly concerned about this, though it does make me wonder if I’m missing some gems that I might otherwise remember in 20 years during a ”Remember that commercial from 2012? Ah, those were the days” conversation.
I will never forget this Purina Cat Chow commercial. It’s a tearjerker.
One of the few commercials I’ve remembered over the years is a Florida Orange Juice ad from about 10-15 years ago. The leading actors are a half-asleep man and a snarky talking sandwich. A bottle of orange juice plays a silent but important role. See for yourself:
Since I love sandwiches and snark, it was obvious that I needed to make this. (Sandwiches and Snark would be a good name for a blog. I like alliteration.)
I started by freezing the video at the 20 second mark to get a good picture of the sandwich:
So it looks like we have bread, olives, lettuce, tomatos, possibly onions, deli meat of some sort, and possibly cheese. Another shot of the sandwich indicated that it has mayonnaise. I omitted the mayonnaise because I hate it and consider it an unnecessary slaughter of perfectly fine eggs.
Talking Sandwich (serves 1, assuming it doesn’t bite back)
- 2 slices of bread
- Lettuce or spinach (I used some baby spinach I want to finish off)
- 1 or 2 slices of tomato
- 1 or 2 slices of onion
- Cheese of your choice (I used Gorgonzola–bad idea, the taste overwhelms everything else)
- Deli meat of your choice (I used ham)
- 2 Spanish olives
- Assemble sandwich. I did it in the order listed above to be consistent with the sandwich in the commercial.
- Pierce sandwich with 2 toothpicks.
- Stick the olives on the toothpicks.
The finished product:
Spinach, tomato, onion, cheese, ham, olives
Because I didn’t have any orange juice, I positioned him next to the second and third most appropriate beverages: Pyramid Hefeweizen and a moscato from none other than Francis Ford Coppola.
On the kitchen table and ready to be eaten
If I hadn’t made a poor choice with the cheese and gone a little overboard on the onion, this sandwich would have been delicious. And some honey mustard would have been a nice addition. Eh, live and learn. Even though I made a pretty subpar sandwich, I tried my best. It’s hard, really, to replicate a talking sandwich by yourself and without the means to make it an actual talking sandwich.